Incontrolado

I was reading "An 'Uncontrollable': Protest to the Libertarians", a document that is from the Spanish Civil War. Really interesting to look into this basically hardcore anarcho-leftist business. Serious anti-fascist anarchists, dude, no fucking around. They weren't even down with communists (USSR was apparently helping to fund the fascists in order to stomp them out).

Anyway, it's super-melodramatic material, and perhaps appropriately so.

Certain nights, the dark nights in which -- weapon in arm and ear on the look-out -- I would strive to penetrate into the depths of the surrounding country, and also into the mystery of things, I would not find any other remedy, as in a nightmare, than standing up straight, unsheltered, and this not so as to relieve the numbness of my limbs, which would be steely because they were passed through the crucible of pain, but to grip my weapon with more bad temper, feeling keenly the desire to fire, not only upon the enemy who hides at least 100 meters from me, but also upon the other enemy, against the one whom I cannot see, against the one who hides at my side, and is still there at the moment, who calls me comrade while he basely fails me, since there is no failure more cowardly than the man who indulges in betrayal. And I experienced desires to cry and to laugh, and to run across the fields crying and wringing necks with my fingers of iron, as when I broke between my hands the neck of the vile "leader," and to blow up -- until only ruins remain -- this miserable world, in which it is so difficult to find loving hands that wipe away your sweat and staunch the flow of blood from your wounds when, tired and injured, you return from battle.

He choked a mother fucker! Damn.